Lyrics of A love affair with distance

I've lost my voice, i've said all i have to say
Youre thick as porcelain, as clear as cellophane
I miss the nervous shake, i miss the way it hurts
The way it killed to think that i had you first
That i had you first

So then i force a smile, i take the stage
Now my knees are weak, i try to concentrate
Im losing air with every single breathe that i take

I look into your eyes, i see the chemicals
You're the whitest white, you've become a ghost
You're dead to me, so why can't i let you go?

The phone is like a knife, i drive into my ear
I had a love affair with distance and with fear
The bus is like a hearse driving me from her
She's as black as white, she the perfect curse
Shes the perfect curse

So then i force a smile, i take the stage
Now my knees are weak, i try to concentrate
Im losing air with every single breathe that i take

I look into your eyes, i see the chemicals
You're the whitest white, you've become a ghost
You're dead to me, so why can't i let you go?

And if the walls had eyes, we would never lie
You could come down on me
And if you saved my life, how could i survive
You're the one who made me this way

So then i force a smile, i take the stage
Now my knees are weak, i try to concentrate
Im losing air with every single breathe that i take

I look into your eyes, i see the chemicals
You're the whitest white, you've become a ghost
You're dead to me, so why can't i let you go?