Lyrics of Loud and soft

Bert: "hey ernie! hey ern.."
Ernie: "hey there, bert."
Bert: "hi. listen the radio is playing soft and then loud. something wrong?"
Ernie: "that's the volume control, bert. see this little button here? that's the volume control."
Bert: "yeah, you're the one that's doin that, huh?"
Ernie: "and when i turn the knob this way, it makes the radio play louder."
Bert: "yeah, i know. see, i'm tryin to read over there..."
Ernie: "and then bert, when i turn the knob this way, it makes the radio play softer."
Bert: "good, i like it just that way ernie, soft."
Ernie: "but i think, i think i like most of all, is when i turn the radio up loud."
Bert: "ernie! ernie! that's too loud. you're making the radio play very very loudly!"
Ernie: "bert, don't yell, i'm tryin to listen to the radio!"
Bert: "i will yell ernie! i will yell! i have every right to yell! i'll yell and yell and yell because i can't hear myself any other way!"
(ernie turns off the radio)
Bert: "ernie! now, you really do not care if i want some peace and quiet do you?"
Ernie: "i wonder what would happen if i took the knob off this radio..."
Bert: "you know you really have no consideration for people, do you?"
Ernie: "c'mere bert."
Bert: "what're you doing?"
Ernie: "i'm gonna put the volume control on you."
Bert: "wha! i am not a radio, ernie! now cut that out!"
Ernie: "and now i think i'll turn the volume a little lower..."
Bert: (in a softer voice) "you know you cannot do that to people, they wanna talk, they're not radios. and i wanna talk and i'll tell you one thing...."
(ernie turns the volume up)
Bert: (in a louder voice) "i have been trying to read over there! i have been trying to read for so long......."
(ernie turns the volume down)
Bert: (in a softer voice) "and i hear the radio going up and down, up and down, up and down. and i don't want that. i want....."
(ernie turns bert off)
Ernie: "keeheeheehee."
(ernie leaves bert there with his mouth flapping and no sound coming out)