Il testo della The 'r' machine

Bert (fixing the machine): "ha! well, this machine knows what letter comes next. i put this here..."
Ernie: "hi there, bert. what's that machine you're working on?"
Bert: "oh hi, ernie. this is my latest invention, my automatic "r" detector."
Ernie: "no kidding."
Bert: "yeah. anytime this machine hears an "r" or an "r" word, it rings a bell. i'll start it up for you now...."
(sound of machine starting)
Ernie: "wow! look at that machine go."
Bert: "now if you'll just say something that begins with "r"..." (bell rings)
Ernie: "what was that?"
Bert: "oh, i just said "r". (bell rings) and when you say "r" (bell rings), the bell rings." (bell rings)
Ernie: "hey! you said "rings" (bell rings) which begins with "r"." (bell rings)
Bert: "right." (bell rings)
Ernie: "why, that's remarkable! (bell rings) hey! (ernie laughs) keeheehee! that's fun. let me tell it an "r" riddle." (bell rings twice)
Bert: "o.k. just don't go too fast. i don't know what'll happen if the machine gets going too fast."
Ernie: "o.k. listen to this, machine: roscoe really raised rabbits while ruth rode the red reindeer. if roscoe's rabbits raised a racket, why did ruth's reindeer run the rabbits ragged?"
(bell rings 17 times)
Bert: "hey, hey! don't talk so fast. the machine is beginning to smoke."
Ernie: "well, i only have one last poem here."
Bert: "yeah, yeah, but listen.."
Ernie: "robert rolled reddish radishes around the ring of rubber rubbish..." (the bell rings seven times and the machine makes a "moooooooo!" sound)
(the machine explodes and makes a whistling sound)
Bert: "hey, hey, wait! hold it!....wait!....now look what you did!"
Ernie: "oh my! the machine looks ruined."
(the bell rings and the machine makes another whistling sound)
Bert: "rats!"
(the machine pops out a spring)